

Waffle House"Are you ready to order yet?"Waffle House
"Can't we just go in?"
"We /have/ somewhere we need to be, you always dilly dally between French fries
and onion rings,"
"Do not! Listen, let's go in. We are early anyway!"
"Fine." And so they stepped out of the car and heard a loud click.
The doors locked behind them.
He stood in front of the counter and rubbed his chin with reason, then paused. Frantically he patted his pockets and jumped around like something was inside of his jeans.
"Where are my keys?"
"Check your pockets


Jeremy the Teenaged Witch +Pro The witch always knows what she wants and she always knows how to obtain it.Jeremy the Teenaged Witch +Pro
With a curious smile on her lips she wipes away the dreams of man. And like a huge plunger, she pushes men until they finally get sucked down the drain of life's huge toilet.
That was the day he came into her life.
He was nothing special. Yet that was how he fooled the witch.
She never hid her true nature from anyone, why bother? Humans were so preoccupied in all the /things/ they say they have to do. She


Translation Error "He did three thousands soldiers."Translation Error
He stared at my paper for a long time. At last I gave up. "Did I translate that wrong?" "No, I just think you should add kill to that sentence. So that it doesn't sound like he raped three thousand Greeks on a battle field." "Shut up."


Mentally DisabledThere is no way to be politically correct and tell this story. I attract the mentally disabled because I am one of them.Mentally Disabled
Grandma poisoned me with god-knows-what, until the day I started convulsing on the floor, freaking her out right good. I seized and seizured until I was all tuckered out, and then seized and seizured some more. Grandma stopped sticking pills down my throat and adding bleach to my soup and I grew up hating old people. The end to that particular story is adequate enough, if I do say so myself. She died.
They say your brain resets during a seizure, and I think its true. W


Held CaptiveWhile she left to use the restroom, Rosco ordered them a plate of biscuits and two glasses of sweet tea. Ill get that right out, the waiter said. He paused and then added, Im being held here against my will. Then he left to get the sweet tea.Held Captive
Hes cute, Marietta said when she sat down. Hes being held captive here. What? I dont know, Rosco said honestly. He just took my order and said he was being held here against his will. They watche


GhostYour house is very old, I told her. This is not a house, she said. Its a ghost in houses clothing.Ghost
I told her I was in love with a ghost and she laughed and said, So am I. Thats quite a coincidence, I said. Whats your ghost like? She took off my hat and put her arms around me. Hes funny and balding a bit early, and hes never home on time. And if we had children, they would be part ghost, but all him and me. Do you want children?
!hctaw eht rof sknahT
I really appreciate it.
--
Whenever ideas fail, men invent words. ~Martin H. Fischer
No problem!
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